political nonsense

It was discovered that blondes make men dumber.
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OPEC’s members have expressed interest in converting their cash reserves into a currency other than the depreciating U.S. dollar, referred to by the President of Iran as a “worthless piece of paper.”
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Santas in Australia were told not to say “ho ho ho” because it may be offensive to women. Sydney’s Santa Clauses have instead been instructed to say “ha ha ha”, the Daily Telegraph reported.

[ho ho ho?]
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The House approved a war funding bill ordering President Bush to withdraw most troops from Iraq by the end of next year.
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One-fourth of all men are ashamed of their naked physique.
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It was reported that UK newspapers report on climate change 3 times as much as the US, and they did it more accurately.
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Fifty-five percent of Americans believe President Bush has committed impeachable offenses.
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It was revealed that US snipers would kill Iraqis that picked up fake guns they had planted as bait regardless of any further indication they were insurgents, the US contested that the quantity of Iranian bomb-making components being found in Iraq is increasing and 20 Iranian-trained agents are still operating south of Baghdad, Iraqi Prime Minister Nuri al-Maliki announced amnesty for detainees who had been “deceived” into joining the insurgency in Iraq, and the head of police intelligence in Iraq’s Kerbala province was detained after roadside bombs and other weapons were found in a raid on his house.
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Scientists found a planet.
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A suicide bomber killed at least 50 people, including five MPs and several children, in northern Afghanistan.
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The United Nations called on Israel to stop its daily air violations of Lebanese airspace.
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Scientists found that a woman who has a sexy walk is unlikely to be ovulating.

[not fertile]
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In Afghanistan, at least 60 people have been killed and 50 injured in a suicide bombing targeting Afghan lawmakers. The dead include six parliamentarians, as well as schoolchildren and senior citizens. It was the worst suicide bombing in Afghanistan since the U.S. invasion in 2001.
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Russell Crowe decided to get baptized.

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A Swiss survey found that teenagers that smoke weed function better than teen tobacco-users, are more socially driven and have fewer psychosocial problems than those who do not use either substance. US doctors disagreed.
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It was reported that 2007 was the deadliest year yet for US troops in Iraq, hundreds of US diplomats protested against a government move to force them to accept postings in war-torn Iraq, the UN reported that independent security contractors in Iraq are mercenaries, Congress approved a $459 billion military spending bill, and the Pentagon was secretly reviewing plans to ease enlistment standards to make up for recruiting shortfalls. The number of recruits seeking waivers for criminal behavior rose three percent last year to nearly one-fifth of all prospective servicemembers. Two-thirds of the waivers were approved.
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Supermodel Gisele Bundchen stopped accepting payment in dollars.

[no longer accepting dollar bills]
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Hollywood screenwriters went on strike. “I’m really scared,” said Oren Ashkenazi, a dry cleaner who caters to Warner Brothers.
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The Venezuelan National Assembly overwhelmingly approved constitutional reforms that would greatly expand the power of President Hugo Chavez and permit him to run, repeatedly, for re-election.
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The town of Orme, Tennessee, which has suffered from a prolonged drought, announced that it had run out of water.

[none left]
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